A Lesson in Family
by too many stars to count
Summary: When Dick finds out Tim has a date in his room, he sets out to teach Cass how to prank batfamily style. Written for the help japan auction on livejournal


**A/N:** This was written for the awesome dragonbat2006 on livejournal for the help_japan auction. I hope she enjoys!

A Lesson in Family

Dick ended his workout early on Thursday afternoon, wanting to make sure he'd be ready when Roy came to pick him up for their date. He wandered through the Manor wondering where everyone was. Bruce had some sort of charity event, he knew, and somehow had managed to drag Barbara along; Damian was probably still trailing Alfred pretending he hated everyone while secretly hoping he'd be "forced" into making cookies again; Jason was likely passed out drunk again, a habit that worried Dick though he had no idea how to tell his brother that without causing a huge fight; and Steph was out buying Cass' birthday present.

That still left Cass and Tim unaccounted for. It was probably paranoid of him but after all these years Dick liked to know exactly where all of his family was. He headed towards Tim's room and was surprised to see Cass standing at the end of the hallway.

"Hi, Cass!" Dick said cheerfully. She smiled and lifted a hand in greeting. Even now, in full command of language, Cass still felt more comfortable with gestures. "Have you seen Tim?" a decidedly guilty look passed over her face as she nodded. "Is he okay?" Dick asked, concerned, heading for Tim's door.

Cass stepped in front of him, one hand held up. "No." she told him with a shake of her head. Dick blinked in surprise.

"Is he okay?" Dick repeated. A nod. "Why can't I go in his room?"

She hesitated before telling him, "Tim has company."

"_Oh!_" Dick bounced on the balls of his feet. "He has _company_ does he?" Cassandra gave him a blank look. "Who's in his room?"

"Bart." Cass said shortly. "He asked me to keep any," she made air quotes, likely mimicking Tim himself, and Dick stifled a laugh. "'Busy-body brothers with no lives of their own' away."

"Cass," Dick slung an arm around her shoulders. "I know you've never had brothers before, let alone four of them, but I've had brother's for a long time now. So trust me when I tell you that it is our _duty _as Tim's family to mess with is date a little." Cass raised her eyebrows looking intrigued. "I've got half an hour before I've got to get ready." he told her, grateful he'd stopped his workout early "Let's make a little bit of trouble for Tim.

oOo

"Just a picture?" Cass questioned holding the camera uncertainly.

"Just a picture." Dick told her. "_Without_ them noticing that you're taking it. This way it'll be a total surprise when we use it."

"For the Christmas card."

"For a _fake_ Christmas card." Dick corrected. "Alfred would kill us if we sent this to anyone in the League. We just need to make Timmy _think_ we sent it to everyone."

Cass nodded a smile growing on her lips. If any of their siblings could sneak up on Tim unawares it would be Cass.

oOo

"Perfect!" Dick said gleefully squeezing Cass' shoulder. He peered gleefully at the camera's tiny screen. Clear as day it showed Bart and Tim both shirtless and kissing, Bart's hand down the front of Tim's pants.

Cassandra looked less excited. "This is – okay?" she asked after a minute.

"It's great!" Dick assured her. "You couldn't have snapped a better picture!" Cass shook her head. "What's wrong?"

"Tim is family." Cass said slowly. Dick nodded unsure of what was upsetting her. "It is okay? To – " she stopped grasping for words. "To hurt him?"

"Not hurting," Dick corrected, "Teasing. We're teasing Tim." he ran his hand though his hair and checked his watch. 15 minutes until Roy as supposed to be there. Roy could be patient and wait if Dick needed him to.

"It's okay to tease each other, Cass." Dick said. "Tim knows that we love him. We're not trying to hurt him, or making fun of him for being gay. No one outside of our family will see the picture." he promised.

Cass nodded looking much more at ease with the plan. "Teasing is fine." she said.

"Teasing is great." Dick replied looking at his watch. Roy may have to wait but he wanted Dick to look good, didn't he?

oOo

"You didn't." Tim said paling considerably. "You _didn't_." He repeated looking up at Dick and Cass for a second before returning his gaze to the card.

_Merry Christmas!_ It said it in cheerful looking text. _Have a safe and happy New Year! The Wayne Family._ Between the two lines of text was the picture Cass had taken almost three months ago.

"Oh, we did." Dick said with a smile as Cass nodded eagerly.

"But we _took_ a Christmas photo!" Tim said desperately. "Alfred said he was going to put them inside those cards he ordered."

"He did." Dick said shrugging.

"We sent out extras." Cass put in helpfully.

"When? To _who_?" Tim demanded in a strangled voice.

"Two days ago." Dick told him.

"Not too many people." Cass said starting to grin.

"Just the Justice League." Dick said. "Oh, and the rest of the Teen Titans." Whatever color had been left in Tim's face disappeared.

"Wally – Wally doesn't know." Tim said frantically.

"That Bart's gay?" Dick asked exchanging a glance with Cass. The last thing he wanted was for Bart to come out in a panic.

"No – he's from the 31st century being gay doesn't matter that far in the future, something that makes sense once you add in the ever changing view of gays in America, so it was one of the first things he told Wally." even panicked Tim couldn't help but over explain everything. "Wally doesn't know we're dating."

"Oh." Cass looked as confused as Dick felt.

"He thinks I'm 'weird' and 'creepy'" Tim said air quotes and all. That did it for Dick, he started laughing and couldn't stop. Cass was snickering next to him.

"Kon will never let me live this down," Tim groaned, "And Wally's going to hate me more than he already does. I need to go call Bart." Tim turned to stalk down the hall and into his room but Dick caught his wrist.

That was a mistake. Tim turned, intent on flipping him, and was only stopped by Cass who was giving Dick a meaningful and slightly reproachful look.

"Tim," Dick stopped laughing with an effort.

"Let me go, Cass!" Tim look at Dick. "I don't have _time_ for this. I've got to call Bart. If you sent those out two days ago they're probably at least in Star City by now meaning Ollie could have already gotten it. And if he did he'll call Wally to make jokes and then Wally will be at Bart's house before he knows what's happened and I _have to call Bart_."

"Calm down, Timmy." Dick said soothingly. "No one's getting anything in the mail. It was just a joke, Tim."

"A joke?" Tim looked as though he had never heard the word before.

"Just a joke." Dick repeated. Cass nodded, putting a reassuring hand on Tim's shoulder.

Tim's face cycled through emotions; confusion, relief, anger, relief again, and finally surprise. "Cass, you helped Dick pull a prank on me?" Cass nodded hesitantly looking worried. That quickly changed to surprise when Tim started to laugh.

"Seriously?" Another nod, less hesitant. "Welcome to the family." He said giving Cass one of his rare hugs. "Though I hope you know that I won't take this lying down. There will be payback." And with a surprising amount of composure for someone who had been on the verge of hysterics only moments ago, he turned and walked back into his room.

Cass gave Dick a slightly worried look and Dick, always so free with his affection, pulled her into a hug. "Don't worry. I'm sure he'll put most of the blame on me. You'll only get a small part of whatever he does." He looked concerned for a second before smiling at Cass. "See, everything was fine. He wasn't even angry. And it was _fun_."

Cass looked thoughtful for a moment before smirking at Dick. "You're next." She told him before walking away.

Dick stood dumbstruck as he imagined Cass _and_ Tim plotting, together, against him. Vaguely he heard Alfred calmly telling him that Roy had arrived to spend part of the holidays at the Manor, but all he could focus on was the payback lurking somewhere in his future. He quickly resolved to make sure any doors he and Roy were behind were locked and pick-proof. That would at least slow them down.


End file.
